This is the Official Podcast from Candeo. The Answer For Your Porn Addiction.
Episode 29. December 2, 2009. With Mark Kastleman.
This weeks episode is titled, “I Can’t Forgive Myself for My Porn Use!”
20 Replies to Podcast 29 – I Can’t Forgive Myself for My Porn Use!
kingsley omonua
December 14, 2009 • 12:46 pm
the urge to masturbate is usually very strong. i want to stop, but it keeps coming. this site is really nice, lots and lots of people are in this crazy habit, but fear and stigmatization puts them off. this site has really got me thinking deep over this problem of pono and masturbation.
Dear Mark,
Thanks for this great podcast. But, what about those who don’t believe in god? Please, keep it non-religious so all of us can benefit from that.
Again Thanks for your great job.
I agree with Sina. While it seems truly that most of the comments on this site seem to reflect religious personalities, there are many porn addicts who are non-religious. So it would be nice for us, non-believers too, to have a point of view that gives us encouragement. There must be some form of faith we can all believe in besides God that will help us quit.
For me, it is the fear of my brain going to sh** – I don’t know how many addicts experience the brain numbness that I feel. It doesn’t begin to go away until about at elast 3 days of absinence but by then I am already back into the hole of pornography. It’s tough. I want to keep trying, for the sake of my brain and my talents, for the sake of hopefully finding a girl one day, and for the sake of just life in itself.
Thanks for this popcast! It really helped me out a lot. This day was the worst day in few months. I struggled not just with my addiction but with my life today. My girlfriend, my school things, my family.. And then.. I was going to sleep and I remembered that I got e-mail today. I listened popcast and got my head set in the game. This saved my day.
I try to read bible every day. It helps me to wake up to the new day. Candeo program helps me to realize what I am and why do I do things. I also have therapy once in a week. That helps me too to realize what i am but also to think what is going on in my life.
Thank you very much, I hope there will be more these religious popcasts.
Thank you for helping me to understand how to forgive myself even when i made mistakes in my previous life i couldn’t break through with issues such as porn and sexual addiction and now this episode has given me the encouragement to stop altogether.
Dear Sina,
He says stuff about God because, all christians are supposed to spread the word of our LORD and savior. I respect your beliefs. whatever they may be, but please don’t disrespect Mark for saying stuff about his beliefs. we are all entitled to our own beliefs. but please don’t disrespect Mark for having God in this, because in all honesty. you seriously need Jesus.
thanks again Mark for your teachings,
Isaiah Jake
I am a wife of 25 years to a man who became a pastor and missionary, and a mother of 7 amazingly strong christian children, During the last 5 years, we found out that my children’s then 75 yr. old grandfather had molested 2 of our younger daughters. His roots began in pornography. He is now in prison perhaps for the rest of his life. Shortly after that, my husband lost his ministry b/c of his uncontrolled pornography addiction. And just this past June, after 25 years of living a double standard life, he dropped the “F” bomb on me, told me I meant nothing to him, and walked out. I am starting a non profit organization on Facebook to raise greater awareness of the devastation pornography brings to children, marriages, and society as a whole. Would you please help me? Thank you, Tricia Parrent
I am really have been struggling with this problem for years now! I am 24 and been watching porn or pictures of porns since the age of 14 or even younger. This is some really crazy, its extremely difficult to quit. Currently i am having problems with my girlfriend because she quit having love with me and i am finding it really difficult to accept it. I know that this is my problem because love is not sex or reaching climax but is loving without knowing that something is given back! Please guys or everyone reading this, do talk to your loved ones about this problem because it may be your first step to start quitting of viewing porn and start truly loving.
Thank you candeo and please keep helping us! You are god sent! thanks
This addiction really hurts. I have wanted badly for a long time to stop. I fear it will end up in taking my life. I continually fight after I relapse. There is hope. We can win this war.
I havn’t watched the podcast yet , just read through the coments. I just wanted to share my story (which is far easier to do on the net than it is face to face). I started looking at porn around age 13, when hormones and curiosity kicked in, but did not masturbate (is that like not inhaling? ). It’s not that I saw masterbation as a sin, I just didn’t see the point. It wasn’t until I was about 21 that I started seriously looking at porn on the internet, and started “jacking off” to it. As I was also still a virgin at the time, it was an experiance I enjoyed imencely. I also noticed I stoped having “wet dreams”, so in my mind I had 2 good reasons to continue. Funnily enough within a year I started going out with my first serious girlfriend, lost my virginity, and stoped looking at porn. When we broke up.. I started again… and despite attempts… have not been able to stop. My other girlfrineds untill my most recent never knew. My most recent found out a few years into the relationship, and although she was not happy about it (which caused me to try and stop again), eventually told me she just accepted it as “something guys do”. I didn’t totally believe her, and in hindsite should have used this intuition to get help then. I then went through a “rough patch” emotionaly (some would term it a “breakdown”), and found myslef looking at “darker” images (nothing illegal mind you, but pretty raw), even though I found it discusting, and did not use these images for masterbation. My Girlfriend (whom I had been seeing for over 6 years by this stage, and had just bought a house with), found referances to some of this material, and understandably hit the roof. While we went ahead with the house (which if either of us ever wanted to live the “Australian Dream”, we had to act on ASAP), and now live in said house, we are no longer togather. My addiction to porn and weakness in not beating it was the cause of me loosing the best thing that had ever happened to me in my life, more than likely permanently. For this, I have not been able to forgive myself, esspecially and my ex is unable to forgive me, and I can see the pain it still causes her. She has told me she wishes she could still be with me, as apart from this one (major) thing, still thinks I am a great guy and cares for me. But when ever she tries to get close again, the pain of the discovery returns, and literally makes her feel sick. I am now 31, and wondering how I am going to rebuild my life. I have gone for longer periods without Porn than I ever did other times that I tried to stop (esspecially since I sought out counceling for as long as I could afford it), but have relapsed, most recently tonight after a particularily difficult afternoon and being in an empty house. The shame and guilt of the relapse outwieghs any “benifit” from the act. I know this, but I do it anyway. Unlike Drug or Alcohol addiciton there isn’t any support groups that I know of in Australia, and no understanding person that I can call to help distract me when I am unable to distract myself. My biggest fear is of failer. Failer to stop, which I also fear in time would esculate into seeking out even worse porn.
That’s the abridged version of my ongoing battle, there is of course far more to the story, but even I am still discovering that within myself. I just keep telling myself that although it IS bad now, there is hope, remain strong, and to keep looking for all positive means of avoiding those relapses.
If anyone wants an anoymous “ear” to talk about their own battle, feel free to email me on sjt9548@hotmail.com
I am in a marriage of almost 9 years & my husband’s online porn addiction has wreaked havoc on our relationship from the beginning. I always regretted marrying him especially for this addiction but feel powerless to do anything about it now. He always apologizes every time I catch him but he’s never going to be free of this & I feel God has failed me because my husband claims he prays every day but yet this disease continues to infect our lives. I have 2 precious boys that I fear are going to have to live with this problem as well because of their father’s legacy. My husband has gone to a recovery group but always throws it back at me that I should be going too even though he verbally accepts this addiction as his issue, not mine. We’ve had the opportunity provided to us for marriage counseling but can’t seem to get my husband to commit; he sees it as another way for me & a third-party to “rip into him” about his problem. I hate having sex with him because I know he’s not there with me, he’s there with all the images he’s accumulated in the last 30+ years. I can’t compete with that & yet he wants me to be supportive of him, his career, his accomplishments, etc. I feel like I’ve been kicked off a boat that has a massive hole in the bottom…all with an anchor tied to my ankle & yet been asked to keep the entire yacht afloat by myself.
I read about all the comments some people made about your commentry about your relationship with our Lord and God, and it let me think when we past away and we end up in heaven and there is no God what did we loose or you nothing, but when we get to heaven and there is a God that you dont believe in what did you loose. Thank you Mark keep up the good work if you don’t experience the love of our Lord you missing something.
I am inspired by what Candeo does for people who have pornographic addiction and masturbation addiction as well. Here is my story. I started with porn when i was only 10 years old and it caught a hold of me and I viewed girls as how I would when i view porn and start to fantasize about them. Now I am 17 years old and I feel that its wrong to do such things and I keep telling myself to stop. Sometimes I feel like I can never forgive myself and the complications my addiction to porn and masturbation will bring to my future scares me. I don’t want to live with this anymore, I want to be free where I can do what I want without fear of submitting to porn ever again. I am pursuing a relationship and I dont want this to interfere. So I thank Candeo for helping me and guiding me along. Though the journey isn’t complete yet, the end is in site.
Anyway, I can certainly relate to a lot of this, as well as my wife (my second wife). Just today, my wife caught me downloading porn on the internet. She did not go ballistic with rage as she usually does, but simply broke down and cried. I felt her hurt and loss as never before. She loves me. we have been married for 7 years, 2 of those being pseudo-seperated. I am addicted to porn. I also wonder about what might have happened to my life, what good things I might have done in my personal life, my professional life and with friends and family had I not been so intertwined into porn.
I admit it. I like porn. it takes me away from the emptiness and loneliness and social pain in my life. I can quit for short time using willpower, but it always creeps back in. I have the bible verses memorized “there hath no temptation taken you…” etc. and they are real and alive. especially “if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrightousness” (I John 1:9). My problem is is rely too much on God’s grace and forgiveness in my life. I believe it. I believe I am no better or no worse than any other human on the face of this planet. So, when I feel the urge I look at porn and masturbate, and get it out of my system, for sometimes only an hour or so. then when I stop hating myself and thinking positively and hopefully, I tell myself that this is a new day. I can begin right now with a clean heart, after confessing and desiring to be free from this. I know His blood cleanses me from all sin and there is no sin too great for His blood not to cover. I do know it grieves the holy spirit and severes my relationship and fellowship with God and Christ, my brother. I become useless, ineffectual in my personal walk. I do not grow in Christ, and I do no good in affecting the lives of others.
I have not signed with Candeo. I know it will help me. I am concerned about my own commitment to this. will I feel even worse if I fail? I am amazed at how many men this has affected, from all walks of life, even men in the ministry, as one woman above attested. I would like to live a productive, selfless, joyful, meaningful life but my addiction draws me down. It’s like I think I can handle it, or it’s not such a problem, or just about everyone does it, or it’s a treatment for depression, or whatever. all cop outs.
check out Tiger Woods. He had everything. and he lost it due to his addiction. Nobody is immune.
Hi.
My name is Joao Im a christian myself .I just dont understand really how can I still look at porn when God warns me beforehand.I think sometimes it is disguisting the whole industry other times my craving just take the best of me and I fall into it again.
I just praise GOd in all the forgiveness HE offers me ,HIs everlasting Grace and compassion .Still He renews me everytime even when Im not worthy of anything because nothing good comes out of me ,only when the Spirit of God uses me for His Glory.
The bottom line is I really really truly need Help from my addiction it just haunts me especially when I feel I’m growing spiritually or in any other area of my life.I never forget after I do it,What Isaiah 52 says and Romans:” the wages of sin is death”
I hate being separated from Gods presence I just knows He has a great plan for my life, but everytime this stumbling block causes me to fall.
Please help.
Joao.
These stories are inspiring. I actually did this program for six months. At that time I was also meeting with an ecclesiastical leader who was helping me out. The program worked more than anything else I had tried, but I still had struggles. During this time, I was dating my wife. She was one of the stongest motives for me to quite. What I thought, was that as soon as we got married everything would be alright. I continued with the program until just about right before we got married and hoped that the high I was feeling from the program would carry me through whatever trials I would face. The first month went well, but then I was away from my wife for a while in a different country and things started to go down hill again. She doesn’t know that I have this addiction, I want to tell her so bad, but I fear it will ruin our relationship. I don’t want her to think that I’m not the man of her dreams like she thought I was. That’s my story. The point is, the program works great, some people just need to keep doing it for longer than others and you need to put your everything into it. I was really busy during the time I tried the program and didn’t get into it as much as I would have liked. There are options to continue on with the program after the six months or just quit, I should have continued on, but I didn’t want her to find out and I knew she would have. I would suggest the program to anyone who is thinking about it, it works great, some just need more help than others. Never lose hope, just know that tomorrow is as good a day as any to sign up and change your life forever. I know I’m going to do it again.
Dont know if anyone is still reading these posts, but I too struggle with the temptation and addiction of pornography. It all goes back to when I made the first grave mistake of having sex with a hooker. I was 19 when I did that. I regretted it so much, but that didn’t stop me from going back to the whorehouse 2 more times. I eventually started to look at porno mags, and was tempted to continue to fornicate. When I was 21 something changed, I realised I could not do this to myself anymore. I remember one time I even burned(on the grill) a girl’s gone wild dvd that came in the mail, even before I watched it. I was determined to stay away from pornography and fornication. I wised up and even read a part in the Bible where it says it is better for a man to marry than to live in lust. Then around the same time I ran back into my first girlfriend from high school, a girl who loved me more than I could ever have immagined. We soon got married, and I felt I had achieved success! No more sexuall sins! Unfortunalty over the years, I feel back into the sin of lust, even as a married man. I never thought it was possible. I nearly went with other woman, and have since been tempted to do so. I also went back to pornography and developed a bad habit with that. Now the sins of lust are potentially more dangerous as adultry has nearly reared its head into my life! I actually have commited this sin by indulging in porn and still do it even though I know its worng. I would appreciate it if someone could give me some advice! I dont want this to destroy me any longer. I have a loving family, wife and son. I have a life to live, goals I want to reach, and things I want to do! I don’t want these sins to take over and destroy me! Most importantly, I want to go to heaven! Please help someone!!!
kingsley omonua
December 14, 2009 • 12:46 pm
the urge to masturbate is usually very strong. i want to stop, but it keeps coming. this site is really nice, lots and lots of people are in this crazy habit, but fear and stigmatization puts them off. this site has really got me thinking deep over this problem of pono and masturbation.
wahib
December 14, 2009 • 1:16 pm
thank you so much! very useful info
Sina
December 14, 2009 • 3:30 pm
Dear Mark,
Thanks for this great podcast. But, what about those who don’t believe in god? Please, keep it non-religious so all of us can benefit from that.
Again Thanks for your great job.
lololme
December 15, 2009 • 10:56 am
I agree with Sina. While it seems truly that most of the comments on this site seem to reflect religious personalities, there are many porn addicts who are non-religious. So it would be nice for us, non-believers too, to have a point of view that gives us encouragement. There must be some form of faith we can all believe in besides God that will help us quit.
For me, it is the fear of my brain going to sh** – I don’t know how many addicts experience the brain numbness that I feel. It doesn’t begin to go away until about at elast 3 days of absinence but by then I am already back into the hole of pornography. It’s tough. I want to keep trying, for the sake of my brain and my talents, for the sake of hopefully finding a girl one day, and for the sake of just life in itself.
Viljami
December 15, 2009 • 4:17 pm
Thanks for this popcast! It really helped me out a lot. This day was the worst day in few months. I struggled not just with my addiction but with my life today. My girlfriend, my school things, my family.. And then.. I was going to sleep and I remembered that I got e-mail today. I listened popcast and got my head set in the game. This saved my day.
I try to read bible every day. It helps me to wake up to the new day. Candeo program helps me to realize what I am and why do I do things. I also have therapy once in a week. That helps me too to realize what i am but also to think what is going on in my life.
Thank you very much, I hope there will be more these religious popcasts.
Kareem
December 15, 2009 • 11:27 pm
Thank you for helping me to understand how to forgive myself even when i made mistakes in my previous life i couldn’t break through with issues such as porn and sexual addiction and now this episode has given me the encouragement to stop altogether.
Thank you very much.
Kareem
isaiah angel franco
December 17, 2009 • 1:17 am
i need help with pornograpy and masterbation
isaiah
December 18, 2009 • 11:20 am
Dear Sina,
He says stuff about God because, all christians are supposed to spread the word of our LORD and savior. I respect your beliefs. whatever they may be, but please don’t disrespect Mark for saying stuff about his beliefs. we are all entitled to our own beliefs. but please don’t disrespect Mark for having God in this, because in all honesty. you seriously need Jesus.
thanks again Mark for your teachings,
Isaiah Jake
tmp
December 22, 2009 • 6:12 am
I am a wife of 25 years to a man who became a pastor and missionary, and a mother of 7 amazingly strong christian children, During the last 5 years, we found out that my children’s then 75 yr. old grandfather had molested 2 of our younger daughters. His roots began in pornography. He is now in prison perhaps for the rest of his life. Shortly after that, my husband lost his ministry b/c of his uncontrolled pornography addiction. And just this past June, after 25 years of living a double standard life, he dropped the “F” bomb on me, told me I meant nothing to him, and walked out. I am starting a non profit organization on Facebook to raise greater awareness of the devastation pornography brings to children, marriages, and society as a whole. Would you please help me? Thank you, Tricia Parrent
WV
December 26, 2009 • 4:58 pm
Hello all,
I am really have been struggling with this problem for years now! I am 24 and been watching porn or pictures of porns since the age of 14 or even younger. This is some really crazy, its extremely difficult to quit. Currently i am having problems with my girlfriend because she quit having love with me and i am finding it really difficult to accept it. I know that this is my problem because love is not sex or reaching climax but is loving without knowing that something is given back! Please guys or everyone reading this, do talk to your loved ones about this problem because it may be your first step to start quitting of viewing porn and start truly loving.
Thank you candeo and please keep helping us! You are god sent! thanks
WV
xh
January 4, 2010 • 3:06 am
This addiction really hurts. I have wanted badly for a long time to stop. I fear it will end up in taking my life. I continually fight after I relapse. There is hope. We can win this war.
Simon
January 9, 2010 • 12:07 pm
I havn’t watched the podcast yet , just read through the coments. I just wanted to share my story (which is far easier to do on the net than it is face to face). I started looking at porn around age 13, when hormones and curiosity kicked in, but did not masturbate (is that like not inhaling? ). It’s not that I saw masterbation as a sin, I just didn’t see the point. It wasn’t until I was about 21 that I started seriously looking at porn on the internet, and started “jacking off” to it. As I was also still a virgin at the time, it was an experiance I enjoyed imencely. I also noticed I stoped having “wet dreams”, so in my mind I had 2 good reasons to continue. Funnily enough within a year I started going out with my first serious girlfriend, lost my virginity, and stoped looking at porn. When we broke up.. I started again… and despite attempts… have not been able to stop. My other girlfrineds untill my most recent never knew. My most recent found out a few years into the relationship, and although she was not happy about it (which caused me to try and stop again), eventually told me she just accepted it as “something guys do”. I didn’t totally believe her, and in hindsite should have used this intuition to get help then. I then went through a “rough patch” emotionaly (some would term it a “breakdown”), and found myslef looking at “darker” images (nothing illegal mind you, but pretty raw), even though I found it discusting, and did not use these images for masterbation. My Girlfriend (whom I had been seeing for over 6 years by this stage, and had just bought a house with), found referances to some of this material, and understandably hit the roof. While we went ahead with the house (which if either of us ever wanted to live the “Australian Dream”, we had to act on ASAP), and now live in said house, we are no longer togather. My addiction to porn and weakness in not beating it was the cause of me loosing the best thing that had ever happened to me in my life, more than likely permanently. For this, I have not been able to forgive myself, esspecially and my ex is unable to forgive me, and I can see the pain it still causes her. She has told me she wishes she could still be with me, as apart from this one (major) thing, still thinks I am a great guy and cares for me. But when ever she tries to get close again, the pain of the discovery returns, and literally makes her feel sick. I am now 31, and wondering how I am going to rebuild my life. I have gone for longer periods without Porn than I ever did other times that I tried to stop (esspecially since I sought out counceling for as long as I could afford it), but have relapsed, most recently tonight after a particularily difficult afternoon and being in an empty house. The shame and guilt of the relapse outwieghs any “benifit” from the act. I know this, but I do it anyway. Unlike Drug or Alcohol addiciton there isn’t any support groups that I know of in Australia, and no understanding person that I can call to help distract me when I am unable to distract myself. My biggest fear is of failer. Failer to stop, which I also fear in time would esculate into seeking out even worse porn.
That’s the abridged version of my ongoing battle, there is of course far more to the story, but even I am still discovering that within myself. I just keep telling myself that although it IS bad now, there is hope, remain strong, and to keep looking for all positive means of avoiding those relapses.
If anyone wants an anoymous “ear” to talk about their own battle, feel free to email me on sjt9548@hotmail.com
wifewantstocallitquits
January 12, 2010 • 5:14 pm
I am in a marriage of almost 9 years & my husband’s online porn addiction has wreaked havoc on our relationship from the beginning. I always regretted marrying him especially for this addiction but feel powerless to do anything about it now. He always apologizes every time I catch him but he’s never going to be free of this & I feel God has failed me because my husband claims he prays every day but yet this disease continues to infect our lives. I have 2 precious boys that I fear are going to have to live with this problem as well because of their father’s legacy. My husband has gone to a recovery group but always throws it back at me that I should be going too even though he verbally accepts this addiction as his issue, not mine. We’ve had the opportunity provided to us for marriage counseling but can’t seem to get my husband to commit; he sees it as another way for me & a third-party to “rip into him” about his problem. I hate having sex with him because I know he’s not there with me, he’s there with all the images he’s accumulated in the last 30+ years. I can’t compete with that & yet he wants me to be supportive of him, his career, his accomplishments, etc. I feel like I’ve been kicked off a boat that has a massive hole in the bottom…all with an anchor tied to my ankle & yet been asked to keep the entire yacht afloat by myself.
Fred
January 19, 2010 • 1:25 pm
I read about all the comments some people made about your commentry about your relationship with our Lord and God, and it let me think when we past away and we end up in heaven and there is no God what did we loose or you nothing, but when we get to heaven and there is a God that you dont believe in what did you loose. Thank you Mark keep up the good work if you don’t experience the love of our Lord you missing something.
Danny
January 20, 2010 • 2:18 am
I am inspired by what Candeo does for people who have pornographic addiction and masturbation addiction as well. Here is my story. I started with porn when i was only 10 years old and it caught a hold of me and I viewed girls as how I would when i view porn and start to fantasize about them. Now I am 17 years old and I feel that its wrong to do such things and I keep telling myself to stop. Sometimes I feel like I can never forgive myself and the complications my addiction to porn and masturbation will bring to my future scares me. I don’t want to live with this anymore, I want to be free where I can do what I want without fear of submitting to porn ever again. I am pursuing a relationship and I dont want this to interfere. So I thank Candeo for helping me and guiding me along. Though the journey isn’t complete yet, the end is in site.
AK
January 25, 2010 • 6:46 pm
This is very interesting.
AK
January 25, 2010 • 7:11 pm
Hit enter key a bit early.
Anyway, I can certainly relate to a lot of this, as well as my wife (my second wife). Just today, my wife caught me downloading porn on the internet. She did not go ballistic with rage as she usually does, but simply broke down and cried. I felt her hurt and loss as never before. She loves me. we have been married for 7 years, 2 of those being pseudo-seperated. I am addicted to porn. I also wonder about what might have happened to my life, what good things I might have done in my personal life, my professional life and with friends and family had I not been so intertwined into porn.
I admit it. I like porn. it takes me away from the emptiness and loneliness and social pain in my life. I can quit for short time using willpower, but it always creeps back in. I have the bible verses memorized “there hath no temptation taken you…” etc. and they are real and alive. especially “if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrightousness” (I John 1:9). My problem is is rely too much on God’s grace and forgiveness in my life. I believe it. I believe I am no better or no worse than any other human on the face of this planet. So, when I feel the urge I look at porn and masturbate, and get it out of my system, for sometimes only an hour or so. then when I stop hating myself and thinking positively and hopefully, I tell myself that this is a new day. I can begin right now with a clean heart, after confessing and desiring to be free from this. I know His blood cleanses me from all sin and there is no sin too great for His blood not to cover. I do know it grieves the holy spirit and severes my relationship and fellowship with God and Christ, my brother. I become useless, ineffectual in my personal walk. I do not grow in Christ, and I do no good in affecting the lives of others.
I have not signed with Candeo. I know it will help me. I am concerned about my own commitment to this. will I feel even worse if I fail? I am amazed at how many men this has affected, from all walks of life, even men in the ministry, as one woman above attested. I would like to live a productive, selfless, joyful, meaningful life but my addiction draws me down. It’s like I think I can handle it, or it’s not such a problem, or just about everyone does it, or it’s a treatment for depression, or whatever. all cop outs.
check out Tiger Woods. He had everything. and he lost it due to his addiction. Nobody is immune.
Joao
February 16, 2010 • 1:49 pm
Hi.
My name is Joao Im a christian myself .I just dont understand really how can I still look at porn when God warns me beforehand.I think sometimes it is disguisting the whole industry other times my craving just take the best of me and I fall into it again.
I just praise GOd in all the forgiveness HE offers me ,HIs everlasting Grace and compassion .Still He renews me everytime even when Im not worthy of anything because nothing good comes out of me ,only when the Spirit of God uses me for His Glory.
The bottom line is I really really truly need Help from my addiction it just haunts me especially when I feel I’m growing spiritually or in any other area of my life.I never forget after I do it,What Isaiah 52 says and Romans:” the wages of sin is death”
I hate being separated from Gods presence I just knows He has a great plan for my life, but everytime this stumbling block causes me to fall.
Please help.
Joao.
Joseph
March 1, 2010 • 6:16 am
These stories are inspiring. I actually did this program for six months. At that time I was also meeting with an ecclesiastical leader who was helping me out. The program worked more than anything else I had tried, but I still had struggles. During this time, I was dating my wife. She was one of the stongest motives for me to quite. What I thought, was that as soon as we got married everything would be alright. I continued with the program until just about right before we got married and hoped that the high I was feeling from the program would carry me through whatever trials I would face. The first month went well, but then I was away from my wife for a while in a different country and things started to go down hill again. She doesn’t know that I have this addiction, I want to tell her so bad, but I fear it will ruin our relationship. I don’t want her to think that I’m not the man of her dreams like she thought I was. That’s my story. The point is, the program works great, some people just need to keep doing it for longer than others and you need to put your everything into it. I was really busy during the time I tried the program and didn’t get into it as much as I would have liked. There are options to continue on with the program after the six months or just quit, I should have continued on, but I didn’t want her to find out and I knew she would have. I would suggest the program to anyone who is thinking about it, it works great, some just need more help than others. Never lose hope, just know that tomorrow is as good a day as any to sign up and change your life forever. I know I’m going to do it again.
Robert
July 23, 2010 • 7:50 pm
Dont know if anyone is still reading these posts, but I too struggle with the temptation and addiction of pornography. It all goes back to when I made the first grave mistake of having sex with a hooker. I was 19 when I did that. I regretted it so much, but that didn’t stop me from going back to the whorehouse 2 more times. I eventually started to look at porno mags, and was tempted to continue to fornicate. When I was 21 something changed, I realised I could not do this to myself anymore. I remember one time I even burned(on the grill) a girl’s gone wild dvd that came in the mail, even before I watched it. I was determined to stay away from pornography and fornication. I wised up and even read a part in the Bible where it says it is better for a man to marry than to live in lust. Then around the same time I ran back into my first girlfriend from high school, a girl who loved me more than I could ever have immagined. We soon got married, and I felt I had achieved success! No more sexuall sins! Unfortunalty over the years, I feel back into the sin of lust, even as a married man. I never thought it was possible. I nearly went with other woman, and have since been tempted to do so. I also went back to pornography and developed a bad habit with that. Now the sins of lust are potentially more dangerous as adultry has nearly reared its head into my life! I actually have commited this sin by indulging in porn and still do it even though I know its worng. I would appreciate it if someone could give me some advice! I dont want this to destroy me any longer. I have a loving family, wife and son. I have a life to live, goals I want to reach, and things I want to do! I don’t want these sins to take over and destroy me! Most importantly, I want to go to heaven! Please help someone!!!